[Snowblind] IC Inbox

[cahooted]

This is Flynn. Hi!

Comments

[motherserpent]

...You didn't fall in, did you?

[cahooted]

No, I didn't.

[Which meant he saw a lot of people go in or punch each other in or-- yeah.]

I wanted to, boy, I really did but I... couldn't. [He sounds almost embarrassed about it.]

[motherserpent]

Did you want to? Are you sure about that?

[cahooted]

Of course not.

But I'm not sure what it says about me that I still couldn't do it.

[motherserpent]

That you have a strong survival instinct, maybe?

[cahooted]

Or that I'm a coward.

[motherserpent]

[She snorts.]

You wanna know what happened the first time I got in a real fight? Keep in mind I'm a goddess telling you this. And you can't tell anyone else.

[cahooted]

[Heh.]

Alright. I promise I won't tell anyone.

What did happen the first time you got in a real fight?

cw major traumatic injury

[motherserpent]

Okay, so there's -- we're in this --

It's a long story. But there's this big party going on, and the lights go out. And in the dark I run into this, just -- a real douchelord named Seth. And he bites me, and I bite him, whatever -- but then my, uh...friend...Bjorn, he hears this happening and he tries to help. With his giant pick. Except he hits me instead of Seth, and it just -- he just tears me right open. I thought I was going to bleed out.

So you know what I did next? Big, brave daughter of Quetzalcoatl?

cw major traumatic injury

[cahooted]

[Tess, that story just took a really weird and unexpected turn.]

... Curse Bjorn and his offspring for all eternity?

cw major traumatic injury

[motherserpent]

Nah, he's got that handled on his own. No, I crawled under the nearest table and hid until it was all over. Like...just stayed down there even after I'd healed myself, because I was literally going to die if I didn't stay out of the way.

[cahooted]

That sounds like a very reasonable course of action?

[motherserpent]

[Flynn are you really this dense.]

Yeah, because it was. Wasn't very brave or, y'know, godly, but it was reasonable.

So I'm just wondering what's so un reasonable about not jumping into a pit full of teeth?

[cahooted]

[Yes, yes he is.]

You just said you knew what was gonna happen. I didn't. And it's my job to look into these things.

[motherserpent]

Yeah, and it's my job to keep everyone else alive, not save my own skin, but sometimes I don't do my job when it's a stupid time to try to do my job.

[cahooted]

Didn't you say you were at a party? Isn't that kind of... I don't know, like a day off?

Just, you know. With godly murder feuds?

[motherserpent]

Oh! Oh, that. No, we were at the party to steal some stuff, it was always going to be a shitshow.

[cahooted]

Oh.

Well. Then I kind of see your point.

... Why were you trying to steal stuff?

[motherserpent]

...You know, I honestly don't remember? It was a really busy week.

[cahooted]

Does that happen often? Gods crashing each other's parties, stealing stuff, getting gutted, is that a thing...?

[motherserpent]

We weren't gods back then. But...kind of? You'd think at some point things would level out and we could just chill, but there's always something.

[cahooted]

[Huh. That's an interesting turn of events?]

What were you before you were a goddess? You weren't born one?

[motherserpent]

Man, always questions with you.

[ If anything, though, she sounds fondly amused. ]

I was a scion. That stuff about being a cook was true; I grew up thinking I was human until ol’ Quetzalcoatl awakened me and let me know my dad wasn’t really my dad after all. Lots of gods do it that way.

[cahooted]

Sorry. [Not sorry.] It's kind of what I do.

Oh wow, that must have been... awkward? I mean, there you are, line cook, frying things, then suddenly surprise! Goddess.

[motherserpent]

More like surprise, bottom of the totem pole you just found out existed, congrats, go do this job for dad and maybe you’ll survive but probably you won’t. Being awakened, though...I mean like awakened. It all makes sense right away even if you don’t know everything. Or...most things. Whole new world back then.

It doesn’t really matter, that was all a while back now anyway.