You loooooove her. Love. [He's whispering loudly now, his cadence changing with each iteration of the word.] Looooove. Love. LOVE. Loooo-huuuuhhhh-huuuuuveeeee---uh. Say it with me now. "I love Nicole." So easy. Three little words.
Nope. I know. It's love. You're trying too hard to deny it. Trust me, bro.
[It's like this irritating insect that doesn't go away and the more Flynn swats the louder it gets. He tries to ignore it, he tries so hard, scrunching up his face, squeezing his eyes shut but it just. Doesn't. Stop.]
[Too bad, Peter, you made your bed, now lie in it.
Or maybe Flynn is the one who has to lie in it. He can't believe he just let that slip. His eyes dart over to the door nervously and he listens for a moment if he can Nicole move around outside. Did she hear him?]
Yes, of course I do. [His voice drops to a mutter.] How couldn't I?
[Especially since he's never really gotten into a relationship that's serious enough to where he'd actually say those words to anyone, so Flynn's in a place he doesn't really have anything much to say about other than 'good luck.'
Well, technically he was probably--hoping he was--coming to that point himself, so they can both use some good luck.]
Yeah, you could say that. I mean... [He whispers a bit more.] She's here now, so.
[A cough.]
Which is kinda why I called you, I mean. Not so much on the relationship advice end, but like, on the how-to-talk-to-people-without-them-hating-you end? It's about the...y'know. Thing that happened a little while back. With the fake future.
[He's hesitant, not knowing how much baggage Flynn was still carrying from that. Peter was probably going to carry this with him for a long time, if he ever managed to get over it.]
[Peter picks up on the tail end of the painful tone, but the conversation has shifted and he makes a mental note to see if he can find out what that might be. There was some baggage between Nicole and him, clearly. Man, that's gotta suck. He felt extremely protective of Flynn but there was nothing he could do about this, no way to help, nothing to fight against. Nicole seemed pretty awesome and Flynn was...well, Flynn, and he was equally awesome, but...what could have happened?]
Well, that's why I'm asking you, cause apparently something right happened. Okay, yeah, I'm not making any sense. [He rubs his face and sighs.]
If it's real...like, it's really going to happen, being immortal, and it wasn't just the town picking up on some old fear to mess with my head, but it was actually responding to something actually biological actually going on here...like, what if? [He's clearly been thinking about this for some time.]
Nobody else got super-long-lived but the people who are actually like that. And then me. It has to mean something. And like, how am I going to deal with that back home? This is assuming we don't get stuck here forever and I become a bona-fide butthead. At least moreso than I usually am. How do I deal with it? How do I frickin' tell them that? If this is a real thing that's really happening, they're gonna notice eventually if I don't age, so I can't keep it a secret forever.
You wonder if you're still immortal and if you are... how to tell your friends? [Flynn is the master of disjointed run-on sentences but it's a bit more challenging to untangle the thoughts of others. However, he thinks he has an idea of what Peter is getting at here and he puts the butterfly aside to sit up, resting his back against the wall.
Wow, that's... heavy stuff. Not what he expected to deal with tonight but of course Peter would be torn up about it. Flynn should have expected it, really, Peter had been so dismayed he had been willing to kill himself over it in those horrible experiments.
Flynn feels a little guilty. Maybe they should have talked about this sooner. Maybe he should have sought Peter out, ask how he's doing, really doing but he doesn't know how.]
Do you think they would mind? I mean, I wouldn't mind. [He frowns.] As long as you don't become a butthead. You're not allowed to become a butthead, I won't let you.
I really don't want to become a butthead so I'll hold you to that. [He's super serious. This is the Anti-Butthead Friendship Clause, Flynn.]
You saw me when I was at maximum a-holeness. Who's to say I won't turn out that way if--when--you guys-- [This was really hard to say.] I mean, this isn't like vampirism where I could just be like, 'hey, sucks to be you but I'm gonna take you with me into eternity!' [This would be so much easier if it was like that. Not that he'd do it without other people's permission...but it would be nice knowing the possibility was here.]
Just... [I don't want to lose you guys.] I don't know. They saw me when I was with my dad and had powers and I was kind of an asshole then too, I didn't think about what it meant to...I gave it up, he said I would be like everybody else. I didn't mind, y'know? But maybe he was lying or maybe he just didn't know because this hasn't happened before, I mean, a Celestial having a kid with actual Celestial DNA...
[Sorry, he's a total mess right now. He's been a mess since it happened.]
Alright, it's a deal. [Just... don't ever actually make him do all that again. He will, but don't. The Anti-Butthead Friendship Clause is accepted but let's keep it theoretical because that was very painful.]
Yes, I saw you. And I...
[He doesn't want to hear about vampires and taking someone else into eternity because that reminds him of Simone and Flynn being so close to doing exactly that only to have her refuse him and -- leave.]
You know, I actually know a lot of Immortals. And they're not buttheads, not... not at all. In fact they're the greatest people I know.
I mean, maybe your dad was evil but I don't think that means you have to be.
Oh yeah? What makes them so awesome? [It's not at all sarcastic, he's genuinely asking. If Flynn says they're great, then they must be.]
I know, I know, but what happens a hundred years from now? Five hundred? What if I live to be a million? Further than that? And everyone I know and love would be like...the tiniest blip of a memory? That's what made my dad the way he was. Regular mortal life was just so fleeting for him he couldn't put any value to it. [He felt a bloom of rage when he thought about his mom.] Ordinary people, his own children were nothing to him.
[He listens quietly to Peter's angry rant, wondering how he could possibly relate. What he could possibly tell him to ease some of that horrid existential fear.]
... I'm not the first Librarian, Peter. Not by a long shot, I'm... actually, I'm number 167 which isn't even a cool number if we're being honest, well, aside from the fact that it's a prime number but that's not really... What I'm trying to say is 166 came and then died before me.
[There's a longer pause.] And I will, too. Pretty soon, probably. And then the next Librarian will be appointed. [His voice turns soft; it's nothing he likes to think about but facts are facts and the Math dictates that Librarians don't make it past year 5.]
And Judson trained us all. Trained me. Will probably train the 167 ones that will come after me, too. So you'd guess he wouldn't even look twice my way, right? I mean, what are three years, five tops over the centuries?
But noo, no, not with Judson. Judson, he's... kind. Wise. Can beat up a bunch of thugs with his bare hands but that's just a bonus, really. He's always there for me and he has all this advice for me and I-I really couldn't do any of this without him and... [Flynn has to stop talking when his voice threatens to fail him and he closes his eyes.]
Maybe you'll have all these people only for the blip of a memory. But don't forget that you'll be in their life, too. And you can make that amazing.
[...there are cool numbers? What makes a number cool? Numbers were boring at best and painfully confusing at worst--]
Wait, no, what?
[Peter's floored for a moment, horrified by what Flynn's just said.]
Pretty soon? Come on, man, you're not that bad at--I can help train you.
[Maybe he was just worried about being able to fight things off?
And hearing about people like Judson...helped, actually. Learning that they weren't all like his dad.]
I mean...yeah, that's awesome. He sounds like a really good dude.
[Good people were a little hard to come by in his neck of the woods. It made finding the Guardians, not to mention Yondu, just all that much rarer and better.]
Enoch said something along those lines. And I get it, I really do. But--
[Flynn thought his number would be up soon. And what if he was right?
--you're already dead.
Those cruel words right out of his own mouth echoed back in his ears. He rubs his face, his stomach feeling like it was dropping out. He shouldn't have to be dealing with this. He didn't know how to deal with this. He understood why he acted the way he did in the future, he could feel it even now. Wanting to push people away, to keep them at arm's length, to stop caring. Because the thought of losing them while he still cared was too painful. If he wasn't friends with Flynn anymore, he wouldn't be sad if and when he eventually d--
--no. No, that's how it'd begin. He'd avoid Flynn, then he'd avoid the Guardians, and before he knew it he'd be that cold, horrible version of himself.]
It's just the job, Peter. It's too dangerous, at some point it catches up with you. I mean, I'm definitely trying to hold out as long as possible? And I want to say I'm doing pretty good at the moment but it is what it is.
[He smiles a little at his friend's offer to help him train.]
It's okay. I had doubts about it once but that's in the past. I want this. I really do, you know?
[It's what makes being here so painful. He had finally been so ready to accept all of it, even the loneliness of his purpose, and then had been whisked away to this place. It just wasn't fair.]
How does he do it? I don't know. [Flynn exhales. It's not like he hasn't asked himself the very same question, it's not like he didn't have doubts that maybe Judson was just being kind to make the short time he has more bearable. But Flynn doesn't believe that.]
I just... I like to think we're worth it somehow.
[He pauses briefly.]
And I think that's how you feel about your friends, too. You should talk to them. I'm sure they'll understand.
EVERYTHING HURTS \o/ ---- cw cancer more character deaths just all of it
[Peter knows all too well about dangerous jobs. And apparently Flynn's was bad enough that he needed a Guardian. And Flynn was badass enough to kill Dracula.
And he himself was in dangerous job too, and nobody would be able to convince him otherwise to drop it for 'safety reasons.'
But still. This was Flynn. He didn't deserve anything but a long happy life filled with books and learning and whatever it was that he liked.]
You can't.
[It was stupid and childish, but he--
You're already dead.
...dying. It was like talking to someone who was dying.
Take my hand, Peter.
He rubs the bridge of his nose. No. This wasn't--he couldn't--
What could he do? He wanted to do something, but what? If they did manage to get out of here and they all went to their home worlds or universes he could do nothing. Flynn would go back to that dangerous job and that was that.
He'd been so afraid to take her hand. So afraid to accept that she was going to die.
Too afraid to offer comfort, too afraid to be kind in the short moments that she had left.
No. He'd regretted that for too long.
He wouldn't close himself off anymore, he couldn't let that fear get the best of him, couldn't let himself get beaten by his own pain. He'd regret it so much. He had to take her hand.
Everyone's hand.]
...Let me teach you something, man. At least add a couple more years.
[He doesn't sound choked up no.]
Everyone's worth it. You're all worth it. Whatever it is, you're more than worth it.
[Who cares if I kill you, you're already dead. The ugly words resound in his head still. They had hurt, a lot, not only because of their crude message but also because Flynn genuinely likes Peter so even after they had talked, even after things had gone back to normal, they had stuck with him.
They had struck a chord with his battle for survival because Flynn doesn't want to die. Doesn't want to be seen as dead. He knows it's coming, he accepts it but at the same time he knows he will be clinging to his life for hopefully a long time to come.
But now they are slowly replaced with something else and he can feel their iron grip loosening.
Let me teach you something, man. At least add a couple more years.
Something in his chest eases and Flynn feels a sudden fondness for Peter that brings another smile to his face.]
Sure, that sounds great. I guess I could always use some space pirate tricks up my sleeve.
[When Peter's voice hitches, Flynn feels his throat constrict, too, and he wraps himself into his blanket as if to shield himself.] You know I never had a friend like you. Or friends, really, it's, uh, it's really nice, and, uh. [He clears his throat, unsure what to do with all the emotions suddenly welling up or where to put them.]
... Wow, you know, I have no idea where to go from there.
Good. That's...good, yeah, I'll teach you everything I know.
[Which...might not be a lot academically, but he's got buckets of street smarts.
He's super determined, but Peter "Avoids Painful Emotions" Quill knew that someday, it wouldn't be enough. Or maybe it would be, and Flynn would be an old man yelling about how new Librarians should get off his lawn. Which would be awesome.
He didn't think he'd be able to get used to it. Saying goodbye for real to people he cared about but...he couldn't take the alternative, either. Wouldn't and couldn't.
Did that mean after so long he'd have to put a stop to having friends? Even if he was nice, did that mean he'd remain aloof, above it all, not letting himself care as deeply as he could've?
But even after what Ego did, all the horrible, sickening things he did, part of Peter knew that as much as he tried to deny it, even Meredith Quill, a woman who adored music and made the best mixtapes from Missouri, was special enough to get through to an immortal, cold, ancient alien being. And there might be more Meredith Quills out there. Maybe he even already knew them.
And maybe, just maybe if things went well, he'd have a chance at protecting the galaxy for as long as he could to make sure all the Meridith Quills and Flynns and Gamoras could have a few years longer.
Could he do it? Say goodbye over and over again? For the greater good?
He swallows.]
...yeah. Uh, me too, I didn't have many friends before the Guardians. This town is stupid and I hate it but--
--if I had to do this, all of this, over again just to make new ones, to meet you and Stephen and Wilson and Bucky and Rhys and John and just...everybody...I would.
[Except House.]
What I'm tryin' to say is...I guess...no matter what this town's done to us, there's good things too. And I am damn lucky to have you as a friend.
Yeah. Yeah, me too. I don't... I can't really have friends as the Librarian and people tend to die around me and I just, I'm just glad that we're friends, and...
[If they ever went back to their worlds Peter would definitely be one of the hardest to say goodbye to. And saying goodbye is already something that Flynn is very bad at; it's nothing he wants to think about, not when this whole friendship thing is already so complicated and new and confusing and it just became even more complicated with everything they're sharing. Flynn has never talked about death and chances and purpose like that with anyone but Judson and Nicole – and, briefly, Simone – and it brings a new level of connectedness with Peter he doesn't really know how to handle.]
It's good to have friends.
[A pause.
Then, pointedly,] I'm not lifting weights with you.
You can't really have friends as the Librarian? Not even like, drinking buddies to hang out with on Friday nights? And people tend to die around you?! Did you accidentally pick up a cursed artifact and put it in your pocket or something?
[Questions, he has questions!
But that seemed super lonely.
Peter was never actually isolated, the Ravagers were comprised of 99% jerks and there were too many dates with names he couldn't remember, but he was never wanting for a random bit of company. Having real friends though, like the Guardians, and not just acquaintances or people he knew, was different.]
Well, you better get used to it, pal.
[That gets a real smile. He doesn't want to think about 'goodbye', think about how many 'goodbyes' he'd have to go through. How did this Judson fellow do it? Experience? Maybe he was just used to it? He didn't know how he'd say goodbye to the people he cared about here. Especially Flynn.]
[Well, maybe that was the wrong thing to mention because now that Flynn thinks about it this is actually the absolute last thing in his life he ever wants to talk about.]
I'm usually busy on Friday nights. And all the other nights, too.
[But he had to admit that maybe... maybe this was something he could actually get used to. Having a real friend. A good friend.
A good friend who needs some ground rules.]
We are absolutely not lifting any weights, ever. I mean, you can? I'm not stopping you, you just, you go right ahead. Live the dream. The sweaty, miserable dream that holds no appeal whatsoever.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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Nope. I know. It's love. You're trying too hard to deny it. Trust me, bro.
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Yes, I love her, will you just shut up!
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Well.
That actually worked.
He's not sure what to do now, he was just trying to prod Flynn into a playful fight.]
Really? Seriously?
Cool.
[He sounds a little defeated though.]
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Or maybe Flynn is the one who has to lie in it. He can't believe he just let that slip. His eyes dart over to the door nervously and he listens for a moment if he can Nicole move around outside. Did she hear him?]
Yes, of course I do. [His voice drops to a mutter.] How couldn't I?
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You're really, really lucky, bro. You should do something about it. Y'know. Before it's too late.
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[He picks the butterfly origami back up, turning it in his hands.]
We're... we used to...
It's complicated, okay?
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Right.
Yeah, no, I totally get it.
Sorry, I didn't mean to...y'know. I get it.
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What about yourself, Mr. Singsong? Have you talked to Gamora yet?
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[Especially since he's never really gotten into a relationship that's serious enough to where he'd actually say those words to anyone, so Flynn's in a place he doesn't really have anything much to say about other than 'good luck.'
Well, technically he was probably--hoping he was--coming to that point himself, so they can both use some good luck.]
Yeah, you could say that. I mean... [He whispers a bit more.] She's here now, so.
[A cough.]
Which is kinda why I called you, I mean. Not so much on the relationship advice end, but like, on the how-to-talk-to-people-without-them-hating-you end? It's about the...y'know. Thing that happened a little while back. With the fake future.
[He's hesitant, not knowing how much baggage Flynn was still carrying from that. Peter was probably going to carry this with him for a long time, if he ever managed to get over it.]
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I don't hate you, Peter. We've been over this. What's going on?
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Well, that's why I'm asking you, cause apparently something right happened. Okay, yeah, I'm not making any sense. [He rubs his face and sighs.]
If it's real...like, it's really going to happen, being immortal, and it wasn't just the town picking up on some old fear to mess with my head, but it was actually responding to something actually biological actually going on here...like, what if? [He's clearly been thinking about this for some time.]
Nobody else got super-long-lived but the people who are actually like that. And then me. It has to mean something. And like, how am I going to deal with that back home? This is assuming we don't get stuck here forever and I become a bona-fide butthead. At least moreso than I usually am. How do I deal with it? How do I frickin' tell them that? If this is a real thing that's really happening, they're gonna notice eventually if I don't age, so I can't keep it a secret forever.
cw: suicidal ideation
Wow, that's... heavy stuff. Not what he expected to deal with tonight but of course Peter would be torn up about it. Flynn should have expected it, really, Peter had been so dismayed he had been willing to kill himself over it in those horrible experiments.
Flynn feels a little guilty. Maybe they should have talked about this sooner. Maybe he should have sought Peter out, ask how he's doing, really doing but he doesn't know how.]
Do you think they would mind? I mean, I wouldn't mind. [He frowns.] As long as you don't become a butthead. You're not allowed to become a butthead, I won't let you.
cw: suicidal ideation
I really don't want to become a butthead so I'll hold you to that. [He's super serious. This is the Anti-Butthead Friendship Clause, Flynn.]
You saw me when I was at maximum a-holeness. Who's to say I won't turn out that way if--when--you guys-- [This was really hard to say.] I mean, this isn't like vampirism where I could just be like, 'hey, sucks to be you but I'm gonna take you with me into eternity!' [This would be so much easier if it was like that. Not that he'd do it without other people's permission...but it would be nice knowing the possibility was here.]
Just... [I don't want to lose you guys.] I don't know. They saw me when I was with my dad and had powers and I was kind of an asshole then too, I didn't think about what it meant to...I gave it up, he said I would be like everybody else. I didn't mind, y'know? But maybe he was lying or maybe he just didn't know because this hasn't happened before, I mean, a Celestial having a kid with actual Celestial DNA...
[Sorry, he's a total mess right now. He's been a mess since it happened.]
no subject
Yes, I saw you. And I...
[He doesn't want to hear about vampires and taking someone else into eternity because that reminds him of Simone and Flynn being so close to doing exactly that only to have her refuse him and -- leave.]
You know, I actually know a lot of Immortals. And they're not buttheads, not... not at all. In fact they're the greatest people I know.
I mean, maybe your dad was evil but I don't think that means you have to be.
cw lots of character death
I know, I know, but what happens a hundred years from now? Five hundred? What if I live to be a million? Further than that? And everyone I know and love would be like...the tiniest blip of a memory? That's what made my dad the way he was. Regular mortal life was just so fleeting for him he couldn't put any value to it. [He felt a bloom of rage when he thought about his mom.] Ordinary people, his own children were nothing to him.
cw: more character death
... I'm not the first Librarian, Peter. Not by a long shot, I'm... actually, I'm number 167 which isn't even a cool number if we're being honest, well, aside from the fact that it's a prime number but that's not really... What I'm trying to say is 166 came and then died before me.
[There's a longer pause.] And I will, too. Pretty soon, probably. And then the next Librarian will be appointed. [His voice turns soft; it's nothing he likes to think about but facts are facts and the Math dictates that Librarians don't make it past year 5.]
And Judson trained us all. Trained me. Will probably train the 167 ones that will come after me, too. So you'd guess he wouldn't even look twice my way, right? I mean, what are three years, five tops over the centuries?
But noo, no, not with Judson. Judson, he's... kind. Wise. Can beat up a bunch of thugs with his bare hands but that's just a bonus, really. He's always there for me and he has all this advice for me and I-I really couldn't do any of this without him and... [Flynn has to stop talking when his voice threatens to fail him and he closes his eyes.]
Maybe you'll have all these people only for the blip of a memory. But don't forget that you'll be in their life, too. And you can make that amazing.
just death all the death
Wait, no, what?
[Peter's floored for a moment, horrified by what Flynn's just said.]
Pretty soon? Come on, man, you're not that bad at--I can help train you.
[Maybe he was just worried about being able to fight things off?
And hearing about people like Judson...helped, actually. Learning that they weren't all like his dad.]
I mean...yeah, that's awesome. He sounds like a really good dude.
[Good people were a little hard to come by in his neck of the woods. It made finding the Guardians, not to mention Yondu, just all that much rarer and better.]
Enoch said something along those lines. And I get it, I really do. But--
[Flynn thought his number would be up soon. And what if he was right?
--you're already dead.
Those cruel words right out of his own mouth echoed back in his ears. He rubs his face, his stomach feeling like it was dropping out. He shouldn't have to be dealing with this. He didn't know how to deal with this. He understood why he acted the way he did in the future, he could feel it even now. Wanting to push people away, to keep them at arm's length, to stop caring. Because the thought of losing them while he still cared was too painful. If he wasn't friends with Flynn anymore, he wouldn't be sad if and when he eventually d--
--no. No, that's how it'd begin. He'd avoid Flynn, then he'd avoid the Guardians, and before he knew it he'd be that cold, horrible version of himself.]
How does he do it?
[His voice hitches.]
How can he get close to you guys like that?
the death doesn't stop
[He smiles a little at his friend's offer to help him train.]
It's okay. I had doubts about it once but that's in the past. I want this. I really do, you know?
[It's what makes being here so painful. He had finally been so ready to accept all of it, even the loneliness of his purpose, and then had been whisked away to this place. It just wasn't fair.]
How does he do it? I don't know. [Flynn exhales. It's not like he hasn't asked himself the very same question, it's not like he didn't have doubts that maybe Judson was just being kind to make the short time he has more bearable. But Flynn doesn't believe that.]
I just... I like to think we're worth it somehow.
[He pauses briefly.]
And I think that's how you feel about your friends, too. You should talk to them. I'm sure they'll understand.
EVERYTHING HURTS \o/ ---- cw cancer more character deaths just all of it
And he himself was in dangerous job too, and nobody would be able to convince him otherwise to drop it for 'safety reasons.'
But still. This was Flynn. He didn't deserve anything but a long happy life filled with books and learning and whatever it was that he liked.]
You can't.
[It was stupid and childish, but he--
You're already dead.
...dying. It was like talking to someone who was dying.
Take my hand, Peter.
He rubs the bridge of his nose. No. This wasn't--he couldn't--
What could he do? He wanted to do something, but what? If they did manage to get out of here and they all went to their home worlds or universes he could do nothing. Flynn would go back to that dangerous job and that was that.
He'd been so afraid to take her hand. So afraid to accept that she was going to die.
Too afraid to offer comfort, too afraid to be kind in the short moments that she had left.
No. He'd regretted that for too long.
He wouldn't close himself off anymore, he couldn't let that fear get the best of him, couldn't let himself get beaten by his own pain. He'd regret it so much. He had to take her hand.
Everyone's hand.]
...Let me teach you something, man. At least add a couple more years.
[He doesn't sound choked up no.]
Everyone's worth it. You're all worth it. Whatever it is, you're more than worth it.
a little bit of death still
They had struck a chord with his battle for survival because Flynn doesn't want to die. Doesn't want to be seen as dead. He knows it's coming, he accepts it but at the same time he knows he will be clinging to his life for hopefully a long time to come.
But now they are slowly replaced with something else and he can feel their iron grip loosening.
Let me teach you something, man. At least add a couple more years.
Something in his chest eases and Flynn feels a sudden fondness for Peter that brings another smile to his face.]
Sure, that sounds great. I guess I could always use some space pirate tricks up my sleeve.
[When Peter's voice hitches, Flynn feels his throat constrict, too, and he wraps himself into his blanket as if to shield himself.] You know I never had a friend like you. Or friends, really, it's, uh, it's really nice, and, uh. [He clears his throat, unsure what to do with all the emotions suddenly welling up or where to put them.]
... Wow, you know, I have no idea where to go from there.
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[Which...might not be a lot academically, but he's got buckets of street smarts.
He's super determined, but Peter "Avoids Painful Emotions" Quill knew that someday, it wouldn't be enough. Or maybe it would be, and Flynn would be an old man yelling about how new Librarians should get off his lawn. Which would be awesome.
He didn't think he'd be able to get used to it. Saying goodbye for real to people he cared about but...he couldn't take the alternative, either. Wouldn't and couldn't.
Did that mean after so long he'd have to put a stop to having friends? Even if he was nice, did that mean he'd remain aloof, above it all, not letting himself care as deeply as he could've?
But even after what Ego did, all the horrible, sickening things he did, part of Peter knew that as much as he tried to deny it, even Meredith Quill, a woman who adored music and made the best mixtapes from Missouri, was special enough to get through to an immortal, cold, ancient alien being. And there might be more Meredith Quills out there. Maybe he even already knew them.
And maybe, just maybe if things went well, he'd have a chance at protecting the galaxy for as long as he could to make sure all the Meridith Quills and Flynns and Gamoras could have a few years longer.
Could he do it? Say goodbye over and over again? For the greater good?
He swallows.]
...yeah. Uh, me too, I didn't have many friends before the Guardians. This town is stupid and I hate it but--
--if I had to do this, all of this, over again just to make new ones, to meet you and Stephen and Wilson and Bucky and Rhys and John and just...everybody...I would.
[Except House.]
What I'm tryin' to say is...I guess...no matter what this town's done to us, there's good things too. And I am damn lucky to have you as a friend.
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[If they ever went back to their worlds Peter would definitely be one of the hardest to say goodbye to. And saying goodbye is already something that Flynn is very bad at; it's nothing he wants to think about, not when this whole friendship thing is already so complicated and new and confusing and it just became even more complicated with everything they're sharing. Flynn has never talked about death and chances and purpose like that with anyone but Judson and Nicole – and, briefly, Simone – and it brings a new level of connectedness with Peter he doesn't really know how to handle.]
It's good to have friends.
[A pause.
Then, pointedly,] I'm not lifting weights with you.
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[Questions, he has questions!
But that seemed super lonely.
Peter was never actually isolated, the Ravagers were comprised of 99% jerks and there were too many dates with names he couldn't remember, but he was never wanting for a random bit of company. Having real friends though, like the Guardians, and not just acquaintances or people he knew, was different.]
Well, you better get used to it, pal.
[That gets a real smile. He doesn't want to think about 'goodbye', think about how many 'goodbyes' he'd have to go through. How did this Judson fellow do it? Experience? Maybe he was just used to it? He didn't know how he'd say goodbye to the people he cared about here. Especially Flynn.]
We're lifting weights.
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I'm usually busy on Friday nights. And all the other nights, too.
[But he had to admit that maybe... maybe this was something he could actually get used to. Having a real friend. A good friend.
A good friend who needs some ground rules.]
We are absolutely not lifting any weights, ever. I mean, you can? I'm not stopping you, you just, you go right ahead. Live the dream. The sweaty, miserable dream that holds no appeal whatsoever.
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[He hated to think that Flynn was going back to a friendless existence.]
There's gotta be somebody back home you can hang out with.
[There's a 'psshh' sound.]
Don't you want to be shredded? You could smash like a thousand bad guys.
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