[ This ought to feel more ridiculous than it does, considering her close proximity to Flynn, but she's not thinking about the details. She's just thinking about Flynn. ]
Flynn?
[ If he thinks about ignoring her message, then she'll come and actually find him and just give him the biggest hug ever, but for now, she's starting with this. ]
Are you still up?
[ Apparently this is becoming a pattern with them. ]
[The answers comes delayed but it comes. Flynn turns on the tablet with a soft sigh.]
You saw the obituary.
[It's not a question, more a mix of embarrassment, fatigue and sadness. Now that the anger had died down it felt childish to fall for Beckett's continuous jabs. Instead, he felt numb at the loss of his friend after trying so hard, after doing so much to keep him alive despite his injuries.]
Yes, I'm still up. I mean, obviously, otherwise how could I answer you. Unless I was talking in my sleep but I would hope you'd have told me by now if I did that.
[ And Beckett's responses made her want to kick something. Or hit something with a machete. Something inanimate, of course, not living.
Now, though, she just wants to be there for Flynn. ]
No, Flynn, I'd have let you go on talking, and perhaps I would have even recorded it so you could listen to it later. Of course I would tell you if you were doing that.
[ It's said with a fond tone, though, and one that she reserves exclusively for him. ]
[ No, she doesn't know that, but she's not going to let a single trace of doubt sound in her voice. What Flynn needs is reassurance, and she's going to give it to him. ]
Someone as stubborn has him has a very good chance of coming back.
[ She can just picture Peter stubbornly clawing his way back from death. But reassuring Flynn is the name of the game here, and she can hear the sadness in his voice. She doesn't like it when he's sad. ]
Well, the weights might be difficult considering we don't have them, but why don't you want to do push ups?
Because I look stupid doing them. And I don't see the point, running is far more important than upper body strength, at least for me it is, I mean I'm not running on my hands. And there may have been that one time in gym class where I had to do them but I only managed to do one and then I fell on my face and then the teacher said I had to try again but my nose was bleeding?
[The words just keep coming at this point because really, complaining about gym class memories is so much easier than addressing the actual problem here.]
And everybody was laughing and what's so great about pushing yourself up and down anyway, you look like you can't decide if you want to lie down or not, just make up your mind already?
Oh, so because of your vanity, you won't even try it. Really, Flynn, I know that not everyone likes the same things as everyone else, but- [ She switches to video, and points to her arm as an example. The layers of clothes make it difficult to see, of course, but she's proving a point here. ]
How do you think I got in shape? It didn't happen magically or because I wished for it. I worked hard for it, and yes, I've done my share of push ups. But I suppose that as the Librarian, you do have to worry less about being able to physically defend yourself. That's what you have me for, after all.
[ Logically, that's true. But on a less logical note, she has wondered what Flynn might look like if he did work out. Not that she'll ever admit that to him. ]
And besides, I know the constant running from place to place and dodging anomalies leaves very little time for anything not directly related to surviving. All I'm saying is if you and Peter find you have the spare time to work out together, you should absolutely consider it.
Because of my what? I didn't... How is that what you got from that story? I was sharing a childhood trauma here!
[Is that a huff? Mmmmaybe. Or maybe falling into a sass routine is just easier than dealing with loss right now.
But he does look at her arms because they are nice arms.]
I am able to physically defend myself. And I do work out. I train with Excalibur all the time? And I'm hiking and climbing and running and crawling through narrow spaces and swimming and jumping down cliffs and fighting angry megalomaniacs...
Well, I can't do it. Because he will be smug and insufferable if I give in now, so clearly I can't. Ever. [It's a guy thing. He thinks.]
[ Inwardly, she's grinning. Outwardly, she just gives him her best coy look. Sometimes in moments of sadness, what people need is a distraction, and what better way to distract him than by giving him a bit of sass? It is one of the things they do best, after all. ]
Well, it seemed like a logical path to follow. You were embarrassed in gym class, because people saw you fall, and now you want to refrain from possibly repeating that same experience. It makes perfect sense. There's nothing wrong with wanting to save face in front of others.
[ There is as much of a grain of truth in her words as there is light teasing. ]
Then think of it as just maintaining all the progress that you've made. You don't need to tell him you're doing it, either. He'll see the results eventually, but why tell him?
I was fishing for sympathy! [He hasn't switched to video but you can practically hear his arms flying up in the air.]
Okay, first of all? I am never telling you an embarrassing story ever again. Shame on you for preying on my moment of weakness. Second of all, it is very natural to not want to fall on your face. It's basic self-preservation.
[He snorts, just a hint of amusement in his voice. Seems like the distraction is working.] What, you mean show off my guns like you just did?
Oh, my mistake for not recognizing what you were doing! [ Yes, she can hear those arms flying up in the air, just as much as he can probably hear her eyes rolling. But it's out of fondness and amusement, really.
And now for a moment of seriousness: ]
You know you can tell me anything, Flynn. I promise I won't laugh.
[ And then it's right back to levity, but not to an excessive extent. She's trying to respect his feelings here. ]
How horrible of me to prey on you and your emotions like that. I honestly have no idea why you would ever consider putting up with me. You should have kicked me out of that plane. [ She's unable to keep a straight face as she says that last sentence. ]
Don't be sweet when I'm trying to complain, it's not fair. [But his voice softens, please be sweet, Nicole. It's good for his soul.]
Maybe I should have. You know, maybe I will, next time. With how fit and worked out I am. We should arm wrestle sometime, I'll put you in your place. [Did someone say keeping a straight face because there's no way he can keep it up after that.]
Would you prefer a large dose of homicidal rage? [ Said as sweetly as possible, of course. And of course she'll be sweet, because there's no one else on earth she loves as much as him, and she wants him to know that. ]
It's my turn now, so the next time we're in a plane, knock yourself out. Well, knock me out, but the point stays the same. [ She smiles, and not the smile that usually means she's going to do something he won't like. It's a happy smile, and not for the first time, she thinks it's odd that she should be so happy in a place like this. ]
Next time the mood for arm wrestling strikes you, let me know. I'll be ready.
Come on, now, I'm not so rigid as that, am I? [ She can't help but tease a bit. ] What would that something in between be?
[ She's very nuanced, Flynn, really. It's not just zero to homicidal rage with her. Unless he's in danger or someone double-crosses her. ]
Me, cry? Have you ever even seen me cry? No? I didn't think so.
[ She can't quite put her finger on what is so amusing about sassing Flynn, but part of it is that he sasses back. ]
And if being Head Guardian is your aim, you have a long way to go, especially where Peter is concerned. I think being the guardian of the entire galaxy is a pretty tall order.
[ Just saying. But she also says: ]
I think that you could do it if you worked hard enough. [ She has confidence in him! ]
[He'll switch to video for the sole purpose of wagging his eyebrows suggestively at her. It looks really dumb.]
Oh, he can guard the galaxy. But I'm still the Head Guardian. [It's simple, really. You two do the Guarding, he gets the cool title.
Some of the pain in his chest eases and he settles back against the wall. It's nice to talk about Peter as if he was still here. Or here again. Maybe it's escapist and ignoring the pain but right now it makes him feel better.
A pause.] So does that mean you're not coming over, or...
[There would be so much protesting, he's sure of it. But right now his mind gets hung up on another little detail. When Nicole comes over he glances up with a curious smile on his face.]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
@noone; audio; night 318
Flynn?
[ If he thinks about ignoring her message, then she'll come and actually find him and just give him the biggest hug ever, but for now, she's starting with this. ]
Are you still up?
[ Apparently this is becoming a pattern with them. ]
audio
You saw the obituary.
[It's not a question, more a mix of embarrassment, fatigue and sadness. Now that the anger had died down it felt childish to fall for Beckett's continuous jabs. Instead, he felt numb at the loss of his friend after trying so hard, after doing so much to keep him alive despite his injuries.]
Yes, I'm still up. I mean, obviously, otherwise how could I answer you. Unless I was talking in my sleep but I would hope you'd have told me by now if I did that.
audio
[ And Beckett's responses made her want to kick something. Or hit something with a machete. Something inanimate, of course, not living.
Now, though, she just wants to be there for Flynn. ]
No, Flynn, I'd have let you go on talking, and perhaps I would have even recorded it so you could listen to it later. Of course I would tell you if you were doing that.
[ It's said with a fond tone, though, and one that she reserves exclusively for him. ]
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[The warmth in her voice brings a small smile to his face.]
I'm okay. ... Maybe I'm not okay, because this is not okay, but I will be.
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[ And when he's in the middle of reeling from a friend's death doesn't seem like the appropriate time. ]
You don't have to be okay, Flynn. [ A pause. ] But if I can do anything that might help you feel better, you know I will.
[ Which is probably limited to things like comforting hugs, since their resources are rather limited here, but still. ]
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[There is no rambling or arguing today. Which is probably very telling on its own as to his general state of mind.]
I miss him.
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[ No, she doesn't know that, but she's not going to let a single trace of doubt sound in her voice. What Flynn needs is reassurance, and she's going to give it to him. ]
He'll come back, and he'll be just fine.
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[It's good to hear that reassurance from someone else and Flynn wipes at his eyes, trying to keep his voice steady.]
Did I tell you he wants me to lift weights? And do push ups, too. I'm not doing that. It's stupid and we don't even have weights in this city.
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[ She can just picture Peter stubbornly clawing his way back from death. But reassuring Flynn is the name of the game here, and she can hear the sadness in his voice. She doesn't like it when he's sad. ]
Well, the weights might be difficult considering we don't have them, but why don't you want to do push ups?
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[The words just keep coming at this point because really, complaining about gym class memories is so much easier than addressing the actual problem here.]
And everybody was laughing and what's so great about pushing yourself up and down anyway, you look like you can't decide if you want to lie down or not, just make up your mind already?
audio > video
How do you think I got in shape? It didn't happen magically or because I wished for it. I worked hard for it, and yes, I've done my share of push ups. But I suppose that as the Librarian, you do have to worry less about being able to physically defend yourself. That's what you have me for, after all.
[ Logically, that's true. But on a less logical note, she has wondered what Flynn might look like if he did work out. Not that she'll ever admit that to him. ]
And besides, I know the constant running from place to place and dodging anomalies leaves very little time for anything not directly related to surviving. All I'm saying is if you and Peter find you have the spare time to work out together, you should absolutely consider it.
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[Is that a huff? Mmmmaybe. Or maybe falling into a sass routine is just easier than dealing with loss right now.
But he does look at her arms because they are nice arms.]
I am able to physically defend myself. And I do work out. I train with Excalibur all the time? And I'm hiking and climbing and running and crawling through narrow spaces and swimming and jumping down cliffs and fighting angry megalomaniacs...
Well, I can't do it. Because he will be smug and insufferable if I give in now, so clearly I can't. Ever. [It's a guy thing. He thinks.]
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Well, it seemed like a logical path to follow. You were embarrassed in gym class, because people saw you fall, and now you want to refrain from possibly repeating that same experience. It makes perfect sense. There's nothing wrong with wanting to save face in front of others.
[ There is as much of a grain of truth in her words as there is light teasing. ]
Then think of it as just maintaining all the progress that you've made. You don't need to tell him you're doing it, either. He'll see the results eventually, but why tell him?
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Okay, first of all? I am never telling you an embarrassing story ever again. Shame on you for preying on my moment of weakness. Second of all, it is very natural to not want to fall on your face. It's basic self-preservation.
[He snorts, just a hint of amusement in his voice. Seems like the distraction is working.] What, you mean show off my guns like you just did?
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And now for a moment of seriousness: ]
You know you can tell me anything, Flynn. I promise I won't laugh.
[ And then it's right back to levity, but not to an excessive extent. She's trying to respect his feelings here. ]
How horrible of me to prey on you and your emotions like that. I honestly have no idea why you would ever consider putting up with me. You should have kicked me out of that plane. [ She's unable to keep a straight face as she says that last sentence. ]
Yes, Flynn, that is exactly what I mean.
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Maybe I should have. You know, maybe I will, next time. With how fit and worked out I am. We should arm wrestle sometime, I'll put you in your place. [Did someone say keeping a straight face because there's no way he can keep it up after that.]
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It's my turn now, so the next time we're in a plane, knock yourself out. Well, knock me out, but the point stays the same. [ She smiles, and not the smile that usually means she's going to do something he won't like. It's a happy smile, and not for the first time, she thinks it's odd that she should be so happy in a place like this. ]
Next time the mood for arm wrestling strikes you, let me know. I'll be ready.
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[Well then. It was just a thought.
Her smile touches him to the core, driving out some of the shadows and before he knows it he reaches out to take another screenshot. Shh.]
Well come on over then. But don't come crying after I beat you so badly I get to be Head Guardian of both you and Peter.
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[ She's very nuanced, Flynn, really. It's not just zero to homicidal rage with her. Unless he's in danger or someone double-crosses her. ]
Me, cry? Have you ever even seen me cry? No? I didn't think so.
[ She can't quite put her finger on what is so amusing about sassing Flynn, but part of it is that he sasses back. ]
And if being Head Guardian is your aim, you have a long way to go, especially where Peter is concerned. I think being the guardian of the entire galaxy is a pretty tall order.
[ Just saying. But she also says: ]
I think that you could do it if you worked hard enough. [ She has confidence in him! ]
audio -> video
[He'll switch to video for the sole purpose of wagging his eyebrows suggestively at her. It looks really dumb.]
Oh, he can guard the galaxy. But I'm still the Head Guardian. [It's simple, really. You two do the Guarding, he gets the cool title.
Some of the pain in his chest eases and he settles back against the wall. It's nice to talk about Peter as if he was still here. Or here again. Maybe it's escapist and ignoring the pain but right now it makes him feel better.
A pause.] So does that mean you're not coming over, or...
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Ah, I see, so it's in name only, not in practice. Still, Flynn Carsen, Head Guardian has a certain ring to it.
[ She won't begrudge him the cool title. Titles aren't that important to her anyway. ]
Do you want me to come over?
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[Another pause and his amused expression softens somewhat, his gaze dropping for a second.]
Well, I wouldn't mind.
action
Though, don't you think that would only provoke certain people? [ And by certain people, she means Peter, who she thinks would protest loudly. ]
I'll be right there, then.
[ And she is, coming over to meet him. ]
action
You know how to stitch?
[Learn something new every day.]
action
I do. I won't be entering any sewing contests, but I know enough about it to get by.
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